Using the Pure Word to Speak Life

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pureUsing the Pure Word to Speak Life

On Prayer, Declarations, and Blessings from the Word

By Susan Ekhoff

 

The Word of God is filled with enough truth to last us a lifetime and through eternity. As parents we can tap into the rich wisdom that is so beautifully articulated by the Holy Spirit allowing it to strengthen and change us. Three ways to bring the Word into the lives of our children are through declaring its truth over them, making our requests directly from it, and invoking blessings from its promises.

 

Declare the Word

Declarations from the Word are statements of biblical truth, often centered in who Jesus is, the position we hold in His affections and principles of Kingdom life. They can be read to the family and children can repeat them back phrase-by-phrase. A declaration can be made from almost any verse in the Bible by changing the main thought into a bold statement of fact. Resources for declarations can be found in books by John Ekhardt and Patricia Young, but I write them myself from favorite passages of scripture.

Example: I am accepted in the Beloved. Greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world. Nothing can separate me from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus my Lord. Because Christ has set me free, I am free indeed. I have been delivered out of the kingdom of darkness into the Kingdom of Light.

 

Pray the Word

To pray the Word, we simply ask the Lord for anything we desire from its truth. The beauty of praying directly from the Word is that we are saying what God says back to Him. We are asking for the very thing that He desires to give us. There are some excellent books on praying the Word by Beth Moore and Stormie Omartian.

Example: Lord, use me to demonstrate that my children are loved by You, the very bride of Christ. Give them victory through their faith in Christ. Teach them that Jesus in them is far greater that anything they will face in the world. Keep them from the evil one that they will not be bound by sin, but walk in freedom. When they are presented with a choice, help them to choose the Kingdom of Light over the kingdom of darkness. Amen.

 

Bless with the Word

Blessings are a holy statement about the future, a declaration of faith, which sets vision and direction in families. I have written these from a passage of scripture on various topics and had the family read them aloud together before bedtime. For more information on blessings read The Blessing, John Trent and Gary Smalley and study OT passages where fathers bless their children.

Example: May you be accepted in the Beloved and know that greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world. May you know that you cannot be separated from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. May you walk in freedom because Christ has set you free and you are free indeed.  May you be continually delivered out of the kingdom of darkness and choose to walk into the Kingdom of Light.

Perhaps more powerful than all of these is the demonstration of biblical principles through daily example which soak our children’s souls like a slow steady rain and bring Truth into Technicolor. Emphasizing scripture in our homes is essential.

The Love of God

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The Love of God
Moral education is a primary teaching emphasis within the Growing Families community. That is because a moral life style that shows consideration for others, is a way of life, not simply window dressing added to a child’s personality. Parents help their children learn moral lessons, internalize meaningful values, and then translate them into social skills. These parents are in tune with the guiding principles for raising children who are kind, courteous, respectful, cooperative, confident, and sensitive to the needs of others. Yet, we know how easy it is to list moral qualities, of which all people have a general knowledge, but the particular refinement of virtues our community strives for, is indeed most rare. For such refinement speaks to an uncommon level of devotion to on the part of parents to live the virtues that they are working to instill within their children.   

Therefore, be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma (Ephesians 5:1-2).

Parenting at this level of moral achievement takes time, effort, patience, sacrifice and a commitment to the refinement of virtues ascribed to a noble and beautiful life. This is the mother, father and child whose inner person abides with all that is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, good character, excellence and those things that are worthy of praise (c.f. Philippians 4:8). No child arrives at this level of moral distinctiveness if the home life from which he or she comes is not already conversant with such virtue. 

However, mere knowledge of virtue is not sufficient without a basic understanding of how children integrate moral thought and how those thoughts eventually form life-long perceptions. Parents must equally stay vigilant of the many moral inconsistencies confronting children each day. Hollywood serves up a culture of death, network TV exploits their innocence, and the Internet is sophisticated enough to identify their secret desires and prey on their weaknesses. 

Yet, in the end, the refinement of a child’s character is largely the product of Mom and Dad’s direct influence. Unless that influence is willfully surrendered to outside forces or sacrificed to life’s busy demands, children will absorb the moral lessons of their home life. Whatever character qualities are tossed aside or devalued will be devalued by the child. It is simply a truth of life. If something is not important to Mom and Dad, it will not spontaneously become important to the child.  

The various resources offered by Growing Families International can help parents connect the dots between God’s message of love and good will toward man and character development. God’s love in action is an extension of His character, and training that reflects His character satisfies two human needs. First, through moral training, children learn of the nature of God, which is different than the natures with which they were born. The natural world is seen, heard, felt, smelled, and tasted, but the supernatural world is revealed through quiet and unseen things like the Holy Spirit, revelation, faith and the virtues that reflect God’s person, heart and will. 
    
Second, the outward expression of God’s love is the great evangelizer, for wherever His love is shown in word or deed, there is life. Children trained along these lines become flag bearers of truth and beauty within the society. Therefore, it is out of the moral context of God’s love that our community finds strength, direction and purpose. 

Marriage and Parenting

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Marriage gfi blog

Marital love is rooted in the security of belonging, feeling needed, and complete as a “soul mate” and partner for life. We humans, unlike members of the animal kingdom, possess a particular emotional strand of DNA that will not allow the inner person to be truly satisfied with just the physical side of the marriage relationship. This is one of the “human” attributes that separates man from animals. When a husband and wife are not one with each other in regard to emotional, physical, social oneness, they have gaps in their relationship. Any weakness or break-down in the marriage relationship, tends to produce unintended consequences extending to the children in the home.

 

While a husband or wife might be able to cope with the missing part, children do not fare as well. Children are not able to rely on reason or intellect to measure the stability of the world around them; so by God’s design, they depend heavily on their senses. There are certain aspects of the marriage relationship that children need to witness routinely. Children need to see an on-going love relationship that includes Mom and Dad enjoying each other as friends and not just parents. They also need to see their parents talking, laughing, working together and resolving conflicts with a mutual respect for each other.

 

We cannot over-emphasize this point: the more parents demonstrate love for each other, the more they saturate their child’s senses with confidence of a loving, safe and secure world. When there is harmony in the marriage, there is an infused stability within the family.

 

Even more certain, strong marriages provide a haven of security for children as they mature. That is because healthy, loving marriages create a sense of certainty for children. When a child observes the special friendship and emotional togetherness of his parents, he is naturally more secure because of his confidence in Mom and Dad’s relationship. In contrast, weak marriages do not infuse security into the hearts of children, nor do they encourage strong family ties. In time, parents come to realize that the quality of the parent-child relationship and sibling-to-sibling relationships often reflects the quality of Mom and Dad’s relationship.

 

Think about it. When the marriage relationship is beautiful, what impressionable child would not desire to share in its joy? When two are beautifully one, what child would not seek the comforts of their togetherness? Parents define for their children the meaning of love as much by what happens in their relationship as anything they may do for their children. Healthy parenting flows from healthy marriages. Protect and keep yours safe!

Reading Aloud: Troubleshooting Family Reading by Susan Ekhoff, Part 3 of 3

FFRI know some are wondering – almost shouting by this time, “What if my children don’t want to read aloud? What about bad attitudes? What if the whole thing becomes a power struggle?” In these cases it may be good to evaluate why family reading is not going well.

  • Sometimes the book is not engaging enough. It helps to establish the habit with books that everyone is very eager to hear.

  • We all have preferences; some books appeal to a particular child more than others. In this case I remind the frustrated child that there will be books in the near future that he will enjoy more. In the meantime he should listen for the sake of others and be patient. Then I earnestly try to choose a book that will interest that child for next read aloud.

  • To me family reading is essential and I don’t dismiss children from the practice any more that I would let a child who hates Geometry skip the class. But I do keep in mind the tastes and interests of my children and choose interesting  – even delightful books – as much as possible.

  • If we start a book and none of us see its value or it’s not written well, I do not hesitate to lay it aside unfinished. But since I often choose a book that I have already read or has been recommended to us, this has only happened perhaps two or three times in twenty years.

  • Sometimes family reading disintegrates into misery on a particular day simply because one or more of us is miserable. In that case we put the book away and try again the next day. I try to consider the context. If my children are particularly tired or worried about school assignments that are due, I read for a few minutes and we move on with other activities.

  • If the problem is a character issue, then I have work to do, but I try not to let a child’s behavior rob the family of our reading time.

If you are interested in reading aloud as a family and need ideas about which books to read, check with your local librarian or family friends. And Honey for a Child’s Heart by Gladys Hunt is another wonderful resource.  Happy reading!

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